Hey, Janet Napolitano--you are invited to my office for a tea party. Have a seat on my couch and I'll brew you a cup of tea and maybe feed you a scone if I have any left. Enjoy the lilac candles and the classical music playing on my iPod. We'll talk. Maybe the tranquil atmosphere will calm you down. If not, I have a Hallmark panic button for you to press. Get to know me, and you'll see just how extreme I really am. I'm about the least likely person to pose a physical threat to you, but I might just threaten your own left-wing extremist view of me as a danger to the New Society. Maybe if you left your insulated Washington hideout and met real middle Americans you wouldn't have such a phobia about us.
So Janet--see you on my couch.